On DLC and Buying Virtual Power

There is a seriously ignorant trend in the gaming world that make many gamers such as myself scoff at the gaming industry. Yeah, thats right, i'm talking about Downloadable Content (DLC). Mass Effect 3, recently released by none other than the greatest publisher of all time Electronic Arts, released the game and on the fucking LAUNCH DAY had "additional content" available, at a cost of course.

Now I don't know about you, but when someone shells out 60 clams for a game, they shouldn't be nickle and dimed right out of the fucking gates. Oh cool, you have some new missions or playable characters? Great! DON'T FUCKING CHARGE ME FOR IT THE DAY THE GAME RELEASES. Seriously, day one downloadable content really makes people wonder if gaming companies intentionally stripped the game in order to stick a financial butt plug in their loyal fans' asses.

I don't mind if there are serious enhancements or additional campaigns added for a few bucks several months down the road, but if you really want to piss off your fan base, day one DLC is the way to do it.

Another lame ass trend in gaming is being able to buy virtual power, giving you a competitive advantage over  other players. This shit annoys me to no end. I commend you gaming company for making your game free to play, thank you! But when you have your faggy giftshops where you can buy overpowered weapons for some horse shit 500% experience boost, you seriously dilute the enjoyment of your game for others.

All you do is reward the fucking trust fund kiddies with deep pockets and deliver a virtual punch to the cock of less wealthy players. Seriously, some of your best and most loyal customers are the ones that may not have hundreds or thousands to drop on your fucking game.

If you want to create a good free to play game, take some fucking consideration of balance when you create your damn cash shops. The reason why free to play games such as League of Legends (which I play by the way, great game!) are so successful is that their model of generating income doesn't revolve around selling power. They sell frills, such as champion skins or unlocking additional champions. This serves to protect the integrity of the game because, when you're in game, you're not facing an opponent that bought a 50% damage boost or invulnerability potion pack or some other similar horse shit.

Saying "LIKE" all the time

You. YEAH YOU. If you're a female between the ages of 13-30, chances are you need a fucking thesaurus. Why is it that women, ESPECIALLY women when they are teenagers, can't seem to speak fluently or hold a conversation without blathering "like" every other word?

Girl: And so like, he texted me, and like, told me he was gonna break up with me.
Me: Please... stop.
Girl: but I was like, "not if I break up with you first".
Me: Here you go, please read this thesaurus *hands the dumb bitch a thesaurus*
Girl: and like, he accused me of cheating on him, but it was like, one time when I was really drunk.

Girl: and like, we used protection, so like, why doesn't he forgive me?
Me: ...
Girl: So like, screw him, ya know? I can have, like, any guy I want!

Seriously, learn to convey and express yourself in a manner that doesn't sound like a verbal third trimester abortion. I don't know where this shit started, but I would put money on educational programs such as Teen Mom and Jersey Shore being the culprits.

This is an official call out to all the dumb bitches everywhere. If you want to rid yourself of the garbage that comes out of your mouth, do this:

Get a plane ticket to Washington, D.C., snag a cab ride over to the Lincoln Memorial (don't talk to the cab driver, you'll just piss him off), walk up the stairs, enter the memorial, turn to your left. Grab a chair and recite the Gettysburg Address repeatedly, until you have been purged of all verbal ignorance. Then, MAYBE THEN, will you be taken a bit more seriously. Oh, and for shits sake, calm down on the fake baking... but hey, that's another post.